such interesting commuters

To the man on the train this morning; You wiped some snot into your hair after you'd picked it so publicly from your nose.
I pray that you book you handled afterwards did not belong to Moonee Valley, and if it did, you can keep it. o_0

To the bearded man wearing the denim jacket, sandals with socks and very old trackies; I saw you sneeze into your hand and wipe it under the seat. To everyone concerned, never sit in the priority seat on the right-hand side of the train.

To the girl who got on at Glenroy station and spent far too long on her make-up; you looked much better without all that crap on your face. The blush you applied so much of actually made your eyes look sunken, so your time and effort devoted to applying layers upon layers of silvery eye shadow have gone to waste.

To the girl who kept eyeballing me; you're barking up the wrong tree honey, and you resemble Frodo's left foot. Sorry.